The story of how we (almost) got engaged

The song “Time and Confusion” by Anberlin came on my music yesterday morning. That is “our song”, it’s not slow or sappy. It’s a punk rock song, but it’s ours. We played it at our wedding, it’s the ringtone on my phone for DJ. We discovered the song soon into our relationship and quickly made it ours.

Like we said, about two weeks after we met, we decided we were going to get married. But DJ still made me  wait a year and a half until he officially proposed. We started dating in September of 2005. Over the summer break of 2006, he was in New Jersey, I was in Maryland, and we were only seeing each other about every three weeks. One night on the phone, when I was having a particularly rough time with the distance, he let slip that his mom had given him a family ring to use as an engagement ring. For the next nine months, I was constantly expecting it. A word to the wise – don’t expect it. It makes all the times it didn’t happen disappointing. Like the time we went to see Anberlin in concert.

I was convinced that DJ was going to propose during this concert. In my mind, he had some how contacted the band and formed this elaborate plan to surprise me with an engagement. He was going to “go to the bathroom” the song before our song in the band’s set, then come out on stage, propose, and the band would follow up with our song. Wrong. And the fact that I still remember all of the pseudo-details of his non-existent plan seven years later should demonstrate the emotional scarring that came from this concert.

Well, he never went to the bathroom and our song came and went with no ring. The hour and a half drive to my parent’s house after the concert was weird. I was disappointed and, frankly, a little lot annoyed with him for blowing this perfect proposal opportunity. But I couldn’t say that, because who calls out their boyfriend for not proposing when you think they should? Don’t worry though, after he did actually propose, I gave him grief for passing up this perfect opportunity.

DJ’s note:  Hi.  DJ here.  I feel the need to interrupt this blog post to note a couple of things.  1.  The thought did occur to me to do it at the concert.  2.  I had not asked her dad’s permission yet.  This is something I would do the very next day.  That is all.  She may continue now.

He didn’t make me wait too much longer. This concert was in February, we got engaged over spring break the next month. That’s another story for another time, but this story makes me laugh and I love giving DJ grief about it.



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